New Goal = Pink Jewels

Why yes, I did hit my last goal. My bracelet is on the *weigh*. Here is my next trinket for my 260 goal.

Shhhhhh it's top secret

Why is it that you can't talk about your weight loss with your friends? They get this weird quiet reaction like they don't know what to say, or they have doubts as to if you will keep it off, so its best not to say anything. So every time I mention it, I regret doing so. It's like you have to have a subset of friends just for losing weight to act as a seperate support system, because fuck if they will say positive to you, if they bother to say anything at all. I really don't understand espcially when I am supportive of their drama, weight loss, man issues, etc...I visit them in the hospital..but when I tell you I've lost xx pounds, I get nothing at all. When I'm in the hospital, the Browns game is of more importance.

Good News

Lots of doom and gloom lately...so here is some good news..When my sister and mom drove in to the airport to pick me up, my sister didn't recognize me. She told my mom that person was too skinny to be me.

I'm getting my second bag of clothes ready to go to the goodwill. They are too big.

Unwilling

So I've had some swallowing issues for about 2 weeks. I had lap band surgery a year and a half ago ...gained 40 pounds after the surgery, and have now lost around 30 of that. But 2 weeks ago I started having this feeling like I couldn't swallow anything but liquid. I was unable to control when I swallowed, so food would slip down my throat leaving me with a feeling like I was about to choke. Since I was on vacation, I couldn't do much about it. I started eating ice cream and soups. And put on a few in the meantime.

Today I saw my surgeon who believes my band has slipped. He sucked out all the fluid and I am now on a strict diet for 3 weeks. NOTHING but protein drinks. Now this sucks because my birthday was yesterday. Of course the nurse was yelling at me for not being more active in the whole "community" and such - I expected that. What really sucks is that I was self-pay. I shelled out $16,000 for the surgery. What happens if it has slipped and this diet doesn't correct the placement? Will insurance cover a second surgery? It is worrisome. It's going to be a long 3 weeks.

Ohh the title of my post? The nurse wrote "unwilling" on my chart when she had asked me about drinking and eating at the same time. Of course that really is the bottom line to why the surgery hasn't been successful..when I saw that I thought "isn't there a better way to more accurate summarize this than 'unwilling'?" and then I couldn't find one. It's true. I have been unwilling to correct that habbit.